A New Life For Your Holiday Leftovers

There is indeed such a thing as "too much on your plate", and "too much too soon", and oddly enough, "too much information", but it might just be impossible to have too much turkey on your Thanksgiving table. In fact, I always make sure to buy a much larger bird than my family has need for, and here's why:

Every year, during the holiday season, my food budget gets stretched so thin, you can see through it!

First, there's the appetizers; usually a raw vegetable platter consisting of broccoli, carrots, celery, aside a plate of pepperoni, pickles, and cheese. Then there's veggie accessories; blue cheese and ranch dressings, and maybe a french onion dip.

The main course, of course, is the big bird, and it's typical American Norman Rockwell side dishes. Sometimes they are traditional, and sometimes gently tweaked to make it our own. We might even serve a baked pasta because.. well... lasagna.

Then we finish it off with an variety of desserts; various fruit pies, cookies, and chocolate (in any one of it's glorious forms).

Let's talk about beverages;  cold sweetened green tea, home brewed, and an assortment of colas that I oddly enjoy, even though I firmly protest the consuming of colas. If we are having guests, we would also include something alcoholic that can be mixed with said colas. Best of all, a choice of french roasted coffee or a cup of Folgers Gourmet Caramel Drizzle (it's what regular coffee hopes to be when it goes to Heaven).

Man, it's a good thing I bought that extra large turkey, because we're going to be eating leftovers all the next week, or longer, and isn't that what this post is all about?

Most of the leftovers are devoured the following day through simple leftover dinner plates and a few, of what has come to be known as, Ross's Thanksgiving Sandwiches. After that, things get interesting.

What To Do With All That Leftover Turkey

First pick the living hell out of that turkey carcass. That reminds me... you should remind me to tell you a funny story about a turkey carcass. Turn that sucker upside down and inside out and remove every edible chunk of meat that there is. It's a good idea to separate the turkey meat into zipper lock bags or plastic storage containers, according to the meals you tend to make during the week, and pop them in the freezer for when you need them.

Now, boil the living hell out of that turkey carcass. Boil it until the bones are bare. You can even break a few in half and let the marrow boil right into your broth. Strain out all of the "stuff" and let your broth sit and cool. In the meantime, sort through all that "stuff" and separate any good usable meat from the bones, fat, and gristle. When your broth is completely cool, pour it into a covered container, and put it into the fridge. After a few hours, you can go back into it and scoop off much of the fat that has congealed on the top. Save the broth in the freezer.

BBQ Turkey Sandwiches : Thaw one or two of your zipper lock bags of frozen turkey. Simmer it in a pan of your favorite barbecue sauce. Add a little bit of water to make it just slightly more fluid. Throw in some chopped onion and a squirt of pickle relish, and slowly simmer uncovered until it thickens. Serve on burger buns, or sub rolls! 

Turkey Soup : Simmer up that broth you make while boiling up your carcass, or your turkey's carcass rather. Season it up with garlic and onion powers, salt, pepper, sage (I use lots of sage!), rosemary, thyme, basil (I use lots of basil!), add one of your frozen zip lock bags of turkey (I don't even both to thaw it). Add your veggies. I usually toss in a medium sized bag of a frozen mix (carrots, corn, peas, and green beans). If you'd like, then a few minutes before you're ready to serve, you can add some rice or noodles.

Turkey Alfredo : Thaw out one of your zipper bags of frozen turkey. Warm it up in a skillet with a dash of oil. Add veggies. It can be a bag of frozen Chinese stir fry veggies, or your own fresh chopped carrots, broccoli, onion, and red pepper. Add some butter for more moisture, if necessary. Add a jar of your favorite Alfredo, or Parmesan sauce. Serve over, or tossed with thin spaghetti noodles, or fettuccine.

Turkey Salad Sandwiches : Thaw out a zipper bag of frozen turkey or two. I like to shred and chop mine in the processor (or blender). Then add mayo, chopped onion and celery, a squirt of pickle relish, and some seasonings (sage, salt, pepper, basil, parsley, garlic powder and such.

Nope, No Teenage Dramatics Here.

Anyone with a teenager has probably developed a discerning taste for dramatic sagas.  Not just any, old run of the mill, poorly planned drama will do.  It needs to be a really good one to get your attention anymore, but the simple ones have now become some of the best comedy performances you could get for free.

Like this one: "I am NOT being dramatic", (as she stomps up the stairs), "STOP saying that I'm being dramatic!", (as she slams her bedroom door).

Or the one that played out last night.

Punkin was quite perturbed that we had limited her computer use to FOUR hours. That's THREE hours more than her average day, due to her punishments, (Merry Christmas, Punkin!).  She decided to express her unhappiness by putting away the leftovers from Christmas dinner, and cleaning the two tables, and vacuuming the spillage off of the living and dining room carpets.

Hey, wait a minute, I like this temper tantrum!

Okay, so she did the chores angrily. I'll give her that.  But it was the events that transpired just a little later in the evening that had me cracking up... internally, mind you... you can't let them see you laugh, or it ruins the whole point, and then the fireworks WILL fly.

Once the cleanup was complete, we all began to settle in for the family movie.  Of course, our little rebel announced (angrily) that she had no interest in the family movie, and that she would be in her room.  

Okay, fine, but she never made it out of the kitchen.

The previews began to play... she moved like a mist into the dining room and flopped into a chair. But her earphones were on and the volume turned up, as an indication that she still was not interested in spending time with us. I can't pinpoint the exact moment, but I knew that at some point, the mp3 player was turned off... but we weren't supposed to know that.

"What movie are you guys going to watch?" she asked.

"Does it matter?" I responded.

"Maybe." she replied.

"Insidious II" I answered.  (I know, it's not the typical family style movie, especially on Christmas Day, but it's our style.

Inch by inch she made her way to her final destination, the overstuffed recliner in the living room, and we all had a lovely time.  She had forgotten about having to disconnect from her boyfriend's Skype call, and all about being angry with us.  And she thinks I've forgotten all about the temper tantrum, and how it was, first very helpful, and then very funny... keeping Mom in a nifty mood, even though Mom was exhausted at the end of the Christmas Hurricane.

Otherwise Known As Camping

Every circus has a tent, or two.  We barely had one. But with a stocked cooler of water & beer, and a package of hot dogs, we embraced the onset of temporary insanity and left the safety and comfort of our modern amenities for an adventure in temporary homelessness ... otherwise known as camping.

Punkin Testing The Tent

We love spending time outdoors in our local state parks, so when a friend invited us to tag along on an overnight excursion, we jumped on it.  It would be a hands-on learning experience, to let us know what lessons or future purchases we would need to someday become true campers... outdoorsmen... survivalists.  After all, we are halfway through 2012.  Isn't it time we get prepared? 

We would be camping in a large grassy yard, next to a lake, and behind a travel trailer that had become a permanent structure on the lot, that we would have access to.  The girls would be sleeping safely in the trailer, and Hubs and I would share a super-single sleeper tent, that seemed to be roomy enough for two.  Notice I said "seemed", but that's an issue I'll revisit later.  The trailer also had a lovely thing I like to call "plumbing", and mankind's greatest gift to itself... air conditioning.

True to it's recent reputation, the day was hot.  Hot, like Buster Poindexter eating a tamale on Liz Taylor's tin roof... hot.  As soon as the cars were unpacked, and the tents set up, we high tailed it to the lake beach for a refreshing swim.  Okay, so the water was about eighty degrees, but when the heat index is one hundred and fifteen, even a warm bath is somewhat refreshing.

We had a blast floating up and down on the swells created by passing boats and jet skiers.  Punkin discovered fresh water clams buried in the sand, and recruited Bee (our hostess) in digging up a small bushel.  We practiced our people watching, most of whom were in rare form.  Let's just say it was evident that Lake Royale was no South Beach.  After a few hours, we retreated back to the campsite in search of food, however that hunt became a search for the campsite!  But this episode of LOST was one of the best parts of the day... an extra hour of riding in the back of Jay's pickup truck, along those little country lanes!  Jay even did a little off roading, accidentally of course, but that doesn't negate the enjoyment.   

Malibu and Vegas

We coaxed a true summer feast out of two small gas grills:  hot dogs, hamburgers, corn on the cob roasted within the husk, and baked beans, with watermelon and potato chips.  The fire pit was fueled, and the beer began to flow.  It was about that time that the party crashers arrived. 

Party Crasher

No, not "Vegas and Malibu",  the friends from Raleigh that showed up with bags of graham crackers, Hershey bars, and marshmallows.  I'm speaking of the wolf spiders that crawled out of the grass to investigate our tent!  The "smores smugglers" were a welcomed addition to the evening, partly because I'm quite fond of them, and partly because they offered me a ride back to the city if the spider situation got out of hand.  I did not take them up on it, but I almost wish that I had.

Quirky Docksiders

After a little conversation (and some quirky behavior) on the dock, we headed back over to the lake for a belated fourth of July fireworks show.  (Yaaay, back into the pickup truck!).  We stood at the end of the dam, where we could watch the techs lighting the fuses by hand, and the explosions were right over our heads.  Of course, we had to stand in the grass for an hour, because we didn't think to bring chairs.  Not even a blanket or a beach towel.  Seating became a major issue for me by the end of the night.

With spiders on my mind, and an unbelievable ache in my back, the night took a darker turn for me at that point.  Irritable and moody, I climbed onto the hood of the car to rest my throbbing feet, and watched as everyone danced around, and even through (I know, men are idiots) several colorful fountains of sparks.  The girls battled each other with sparkler swords.  The firepit popped with firecrackers, and glowed in a mist of red and green smoke bombs. When the smoke cleared and the sparks died out, most of the group disappeared into the darkness on the dock.  Hubsy fed the fire until it satisfied his latent pyromania, and then vanished into the darkness behind Bee and the Jayman, leaving me alone and frustrated.  I would have joined them, but again, no seating.  Every chair on the dock was "occu-pado", and my legs were as heavy as "hippo-pados", so I waited.  Upon Hubsy's return, he listened to me vent, and like a snake oil salesman, he suggested a remedy to cure my most pressing ailment ...  full sobriety.  On such a sweltering day, I opted to keep bottles of water nearby, rather than beer, for the entire day.  Now it was late, and I was thinking "Better late than never!"

The Princess and the Sugar High

I must take a moment to mention that my girls were handling this whole experience very well.  They, too, think fondly of our friends, and they thoroughly enjoyed being allowed to sit among the adults and participate in the mature conversation (although mature might be pushing it a little).  I'm sure that deep inside they were engaged in some serious Darwin-like observation, and making mental notes of everything said and done.  They were living it up on the temporary reprieve of their soda restriction, and the marshmallowy gooeyness provided by Vegas, the self proclaimed "best smores maker ever".  By the way, who ever decided that smores were the perfect snack on a camp out was probably not sober at the time, either.  If you should decide to partake of this decadent dessert, make sure to be near a water source, or bring plenty of wet wipes!

Men and Their Fire

When much of the crew left the dock and retreated to the comfort of the trailer for a while, Hubs and I confiscated the dock chairs, and set them up around the fire, for some comfort of our own.  Since the battery of Jay's truck was wearing down, from playing the radio all day, Hubs turned it off and turned on the music player on his Kindle Fire.  Malibu and Vegas headed back to the city, and Bee and Jay joined us on the lawn.  The kids were sent to bed, and they reluctantly obeyed, although popped out a few more times to test the waters.

The rest of the evening was reserved for the remaining adults.  We shared a few scary stories in true campfire style, but it didn't take long for us to realize that, at some point, we had morphed into the walking dead.  The time had come to test the tent theory, and my theory had been disproved.  The super single sleeper tent was not large enough for Hubs and I sleep, even uncomfortably so.  The body heat of two adults who had been active in the sun all day turned the small space into a sweltering tropical dungeon.  After about thirty minutes, we were clambering to get out and worship what I came to know as "Sweet Mother Oxygen".  Indeed the night air was sweet and cool with a slight breeze coming off the water.  We sat on the dock in the small hours of the twilight, listening to a flock of geese honking and squawking in the darkness, and trying to figure out if our eyes were playing tricks on us, or were we really seeing little critters on the lawns around us.  We completely enjoyed the peace and serenity of our environment, until deciding to seek slumber from the reclining bucket seats of the car.  It came complete with air conditioning and soft music.

I managed to coax twenty minutes of rest out of the night.  Hubsy was blessed with a solid two hours.  At six in the morning, I went inside for the benefit of ... plumbing, and discovered that, while the Princess snoozed soundly on the sofa bed, Punkin hadn't had a minute of sleep either.  And so the first fireside meeting of the Biancos was called to order, and we second and thirded the motion to get the hell out of there!  Not wanting to seem like ungrateful campsite flee-ers,  we cleaned up the area of scattered debris from the previous night, wrote a farewell note, packed up, and headed back to, what I have come to call "Sweet Mother Home".  Does anyone see a pattern developing here? 





The Circus Travels The Eastern Seaboard

The Ringmaster's personal circus recently returned from a ten day tour of the Eastern Seaboard!  It was an amazing time, but we are very happy to be home.  A six hour drive from Raleigh to Baltimore became eight hours on the road, but that's nothing new to us.  There's just something about Southern Maryland that makes people decide to park on I-95 and enjoy the scenery (I guess).  Not to mention the broken down tour bus in the center lane just outside of DC.  A few days at my mom's house, and then we hit the road again, on our way to Connecticut.

Here is a top ten list of our favorite vacation memories, in no particular order.

(1) Geo-caching

For those of you, who might be unfamiliar with this "sport/game", then may I direct you here to learn all about it.  For those who are familiar, let me tell you about our travel caching adventures.  It started at the NC border, where I left my mark in a micro-cache hidden at the Virginia Welcome Center.  On our first day in Baltimore we donated pints of blood to the thorns and mosquitoes that guarded an unfinadable cache in the woods, but we were rewarded with two other finds on that day.  Once in West Haven, Connecticut, we found our first cache right in the town square!  We braved the rain, and the wrath of the nesting American Oystercatchers, to hunt for another unfindable on the beach, but made up for it by finding one on our day trip to the Mystic Seaport!  Before leaving New England, we braved snakes and skeeters to find another in a hollowed out tree trunk in the woods.  On the way back home, I revisited a previous find in Baltimore to place my trackable Travelbug, Benny the Bear.

(2) Batman

This is one of the nicknames for my four year old niece, who regularly dresses up in super hero costumes to rid the living area of dastardly villains.  I haven't seen her in two years, but in that time she has somehow morphed into an eccentric, three foot tall, thirty year old Yale professor... with attitude.  Her precocious quips kept our jaws gaping in shock and awe, as did her rebellious tantrums.  (I may someday have to incorporate a series in this blog, dedicated to her antics, because you really need to experience a series of events and conversations with her to truly understand why my sister is losing her hair, and my mother babbles in the corner after a day with her).      

(3) Mr. Cooper

The working cooper's shop, (the barrel maker), was an educational experience.  The cooper himself, whose name was Sam, looked just like actor Patrick Harris!  He recruited my Princess to assist in a couple of demonstrations.  Then Punkin joined in, along with several other children, to construct a small bucket.  Several hours later, as the village was closing up for the day, and all of the employees and volunteers were heading out, along with straggling visitors, Mr. Cooper stopped me.  With his hand on my shoulder, and his bright blue eyes looking right into mine, he complimented me on the raising of my daughters.  He said that of all the children, they were the best behaved, with the sweetest personalities.  He said that he just knew that that would be my doing.  Up until that point, it had been a wonderful day.  The weather was just perfect, the sky was clear, a little breeze blew off the harbor.  I had gathered and experienced a wealth of historical information.  My Hubsy, as always, was chivalrous and generous.  The girls were happy and not fighting.  And then Mr. Cooper came along, and made me cry, bless his heart.  He just sent me over the top.  I don't think Mike Tyson could have punched the smile off of my face that evening.

(4) The Breaking of the Wind

As we toured a quaint little museum house full of nineteenth century (and earlier) works of art, depicting whaling ships and their captains, and such, the little old lady who stood nearby experienced a little wind in her sails, so to speak.  I must admit that as the echo died away, I resigned myself to the possibility that the culprit was indeed one of my own clan, and so I simply walked away in delightful ignorance.  Hubsy tells me that he immediately and automatically looked in her direction with shock and disgust on his face, only to be met by her own disgust, at his disgust.  Of course, as soon as the lady left the room, the kids ran over to publicly accuse their dad! 

(5) Revolutionary

While checking out the tourism site for Connecticut, we saw that their motto is "Still Revolutionary".  Thinking on our temporary lodging in Hubsy's mother's apartment:  no internet, and only two television channels (both resembling a perpetual Nick At Night marathon).  Whenever you got a cellphone call, or a text message, There goes the channel!  If it weren't for our Kindles, full of gaming apps, and the local library's wi-fi service, the kids would've lost their minds!  Hubsy and I looked at each other and said "Yup, still revolutionary."

Every Circus Has A Horse

(6) Jack And Zena

I am such a sucker for a horse and carriage.  As soon as I spotted one rolling around the Mystic village, I started snapping pictures.  After lunch, since the restaurant was just across the lawn from the carriage stop, we decided to take the ride.  That's when we got a real education!  John (or Jack), the driver, explained how he and some of his 20 horses have appeared in several movies, and a television series.  Matthew McConoughey and Morgan Freeman rode in that very carriage in the movie "Amistad".  And Hugh Jackman was seen riding it in "Kate & Leopold".  He currently films scenes in the series "Boardwalk Empire".  While we were captivated by the Hollywood connection, Zena became captivated by Hubsy.  After the ride, we stood around and chatted with John, and took photos of the horse, as we rubbed her sides.  She kept turning her head, and butting Hubs with her nose, until he petted her again.  I swear, we just can't take him anywhere where the gals don't flock around.

(7) Fort McHenry

Another day of soaking up a little history, especially in the year that marks the 200th anniversary of the War of 1812.  My Dad joined us, as did my sister and the little Batman.  The day started off interesting when we lost Hubsy in a crowded theater room.  After searching the lobby, the bathrooms, the gift shop, and peering outside ...  Sissy  discovered him among the crowd.  We called it her first cache!    During our tour of the grounds, I reacquainted myself with one of the old prison cells, near which I had one of my first paranormal experiences as a child.  No experience this time, though my daughters and I gave loving prayers to any remaining spirits.  Batman beat on the bongos for a while.  Actually, they were barrels of gunpowder.  I hollered to her "they're gonna blow!", and she ran like the wind.  Some superhero.  We found a bird's nest with beautiful blue eggs nestled inside.  We arrived in time to watch the changing of the flag, and watched volunteer soldiers stand at attention while musicians played.  To top the whole day off, Sissy and I stood at the tip of Locust Point (the little peninsula in Baltimore's outer harbor, on which the Fort sits), and memorialized our great great grandfather who drowned near here in 1897.  The following weekend, on our way through Baltimore, heading back home to North Carolina, we were lucky enough to catch part of the Blue Angels Airshow, being performed over the harbor, and directly over our car on I-95!

   

Second Cousin-In-Law

(8)Meeting Friends

Some time ago, I began Facebook chatting with one of Hubsy's long lost cousins.  I say "long lost" because they are both the kind of relatives that you typically only see at weddings and funerals, and my Hubsy typically only goes to the funerals.  Cuz and I stay in touch regularly, and discuss anything from politics and religion to social issues and (my favorite) family ancestry.  He's a real intellectual, and his vocabulary intimidates me, though his never ending stream of shared guitar photos bores me.  But when Facebook says "He read this article:", I think I'm gonna check it out (as long as it's not about the Grateful Dead).

(9) The Time Warp

As I mentioned in the Ft McHenry section, I nurtured my internal connection with a respected and beloved ancestor, Peter Barrows, with a tree and a prayer, at Locust Point.  While trapped in a traffic nightmare in New Haven, I glanced down a side street and was able to pick out the house where my husband's paternal great grandparents had once lived, after immigrating from Italy. Learning the Cooper's secrets in Mystic Seaport gave me a taste of life for some of my earlier ancestors, who also worked in the trade.  As an ancestry researcher, I am completely in love with the history, and wherever I go, I tend to find myself making connections to the family tree. 

(10) Quality Time

Of course, we had our quality time together on this trip, but The Boy had some quality time of his own.  While we were experiencing a celebration of American Independence at Ft McHenry, he was experiencing a little independence of his own.  Ten days alone in the house, with no one to nag him about his chores.  Having to rely on his own feet to get to and from work, without the assistance of our car.  Having to prepare his own meals, without me to answer his pleas of "Mom, how do I cook this?".  He is twenty years old now, and I was hoping that a little taste of life on his own would encourage him to get that second job, so that he could save for his own place.  Hmmm... Didn't seem to work.

Hurricane St Nicholas - A Ten List

I think it's quite ironic that the Atlantic Hurricane season ends just about the time that the Christmas season begins. They both require the same amount of preparation, cause a similar amount of anxiety, and leave us with an equal amount of destruction.  With that in mind, may I present my Top Ten List of the week:

Ten Things That Christmas and Hurricanes Have In Common

1)  Preparing:  Thanks to modern meteorological technology, we can see a hurricane developing, track it's movements, and predict when and where it will make it's landfall. Thus we know when to begin our preparations, although most people wait until a storm has been named to do so. Similarly, we see Christmas coming from twelve months away every year, though most of us don't begin preparing until the season opener, the day after Thanksgiving.

2)  Collecting:  Although the types of materials we collect may vary per event, there are indeed necessary materials to collect for both events. For one, there is a need for sheets of wood and plastic, electric generators and batteries, flashlights and candles, and rolls of tape. For the other, we collect sheets of colorful paper, blinking lights and decorations, and oddly enough... candles, batteries, and rolls of tape. Coincidence? I think not.

3)  Hoarding:  We also gather food supplies for these two separate events.  A hurricane requires gallons and gallons of water, and a generous portion of canned foods.  Things that can sustain us through the physical hardship.  The holiday calls for turkeys and hams, potatoes of the white or sweet varieties, breads, pies, and cookies.  Comfort food to sustain us through the emotional chaos.

4)  Anticipation:  We sit, huddled together in the family room, telling stories, or singing familiar chanties, while we await the storm. Dopplers are tracking the eye of the hurricane and the fat man's sleigh.  Sleepless hours pass, and still we wait.  Then, with the dawning of the sun... let the games begin!

5)  The Experience:  Still, or rather once again, we find ourselves huddled together in one room.  The overhead lights are flashing on and off, or the colorful lights on the tree are blinking.  We either hear the groaning and howling of the wind announcing it's arrival, or of Eartha Kitt declaring what she wants from Santa Claus.  We experience things first hand that we've only ever seen on television; a neighbor's roof passing by like a low flying plane, a Snuggie, street signs fervently rattling, a Chia Head.  

6)  The Aftermath:  In the end, in both cases, we are left with days worth of recuperating.  Outside there may be fallen trees, and roofing tiles strewn about the yard;  but inside there are hollowed out boxes, torn bits of paper, and ribbons strewn about the house.

7)  Communication:  Suddenly, there is a need to make contact with everyone you know to see how they made out.

8)  Vacation:  The kids will now have days, or weeks off from school.  Even though there's plenty to do, they will eventually suffer a case of boredom, and we will count the days until the school reopens, and the kids are once again out of our hair.

9)  The Cleanup:  At first, we'll survey the damage, and then be absolutely frustrated at not even knowing where to begin.  We'll fill bag after bag of debris, and wonder if the county will throw in an extra day of trash service.  There will be the rearranging of furniture to accommodate new items that have been brought into the home, like tree branches or HDTVs.

10)  Moving On:  There will come a time when we will have to put it all behind us, and get on with our regular routines.   The event will not be soon forgotten, and we will continue to speak of it for weeks yet to come.  We may even promise that next time, we'll be better prepared and earlier, (though most of us probably won't).   

A Busy Christmas Eve Eve

First thought:  I need a new calendar.  2011 is coming to an end rather quickly.  I already have appointments set for the new year, but I have no next year's calendar on which to solidify them.  If I had a 2012 calendar, then I could rid my bulletin board of all the loose appointment cards that clutter it up.  And speaking of days of the week, The Boy has neglected to keep track of them since he began working.  Yesterday was trash day, and the truck passed us by, without a bin at my curb.  How in the world are we going to fit all the Christmas Day trash in the bin, on top of all of last week's daily refuse, while we wait for next Thursday's truck?!

Okay, enough complaining about the future and the past... let's move on to the present.  Today is Christmas Eve Eve, the busiest day of the year.  The carpet needed a good vacuum, so that it could be shampoo'ed.  I had to shampoo it because Kitty decided to use it as a litter box, because she was thrown off by the baking soda that I sprinkled in her real litter box.  (Whew! Who knew that run on sentences are just as tiring when typed as they are when spoken).  While shampooing, I noticed that my brush heads were not rotating.  So I proceeded to take the machine apart, with the intent to fix it.  However, all that really happened was that I stared at all the mechanisms that I know nothing about, before putting it all back together again.  So the machine will spit water, and suck it up, but will not scrub the fibers, which really irks the OCD side of me.  I'll give you one guess as to who will be shopping for a new carpet shampooer when the tax refund comes in next year.

Since Christmas Eve is the day we choose to enjoy our big holiday meal, today will be spent baking pies, breads, and cookies for dessert ... chopping and slicing carrots, celery, cheese and pickles for the snack tray ... and vacuuming, straightening, and deodorizing the house.  It's 12:30 pm... I'm on my second pot of coffee, and I haven't yet showered and dressed for the day.  I've had to re-vacuum the hallway, as my daughter stepped in the flour that I spilled on the floor, and left white footprints on the carpet.  I still have to season the turkey for roasting tomorrow, and cover the table with cloths and festive candles. While waiting for the oven timer to buzz, I'm blogging to you.  Busy busy busy. 

So what is the moral of this story, kids?  Appreciate your Mama, 'cause holidays don't just happen, they are created by the Wonderful Wizard of Ma's.  And don't you dare peek behind the curtain... all you'll find is a tired old woman, with bedhead, in pajamas and a pumpkin splattered apron, pulling all the strings!

Merry Christmas!          

Our Family's Christmas Traditions

Some things never change, and some things must.  It's up to us to figure out which things are which.  That's life, in a nutshell.  Holiday traditions are no exception to that rule.  Here is a top ten list of our family's holiday traditions, some that will never change, and some that are in the midst that very process this year.

1)  The Winter Holiday season does not begin until after the fall harvest celebration, otherwise known as Thanksgiving.  Regardless of the stores that tried to force it down our throats while we were still preparing our Halloween costumes.  As tempted as I may have been, which was somewhat tempted, I didn't even dig the Christmas boxes out of my closet until after the turkey platter was used, cleaned, and stored away.  However, my daughter had been hospitalized for two weeks before the Autumn Feast, and I had promised her that I would not put up the tree until she came home.  So this year's tradition was almost thwarted ... but we were blessed once again, as God brought her home to us on Thanksgiving Eve!

2)  The countdown begins.  Some of you have calenders, with little windows that you open each day to reveal a festive scene, as you count the days until Christmas eve.  Some have calenders with pockets that you fill with a treat to take each day until the BIG one.  We have candy ribbons.  My mom made one for my sister and I when we were very little, and each night we ate a piece of candy before bed to help us keep track of the days of December.  She crafted one for each of my children, to keep the tradition going.  I tried to go without the ribbons this year, I really did.  But on December 9th, I fell to the rebellion.  The ribbons are up.

3)  Santa Claus will NOT be coming down our chimney this year.  Not because I intend to light the logs in the fireplace.  And not because we're on the naughty list, although some of us may very well be.  But because the youngest of the young'ens has finally been made aware ... of what I won't say because I don't know who may be reading this, and I'm not one to spill someone else's secrets.  Let's just say that we've said our farewells to the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, and Slash (for you South Park fans).

4)  Holiday cookies... are coming out of a Pillsbury tube this year.  Last year I spent a whole day kneading and rolling dough, just so my girls could cut and decorate ONE tray of cookies before they declared boredom and abandoned me.  Hubsy, The Boy, and I were left to cut and decorate another three dozen sugar cookies on our own.  I am NOT doing that again.  Another tradition gone.

5)  The Christmas Ham.  Yummm.  Each year the whole house fills with the wafting scents of that roasting thigh of pig, the honey/brown sugar syrup in which it bathes, and the tender hint of the cloves that pin the sweet pineapple slices to the meat.  I can almost smell it now... which is weird because we're having turkey this year, dammit.  I waited and waited for the grocery store to stock their freezers with the hams that go on sale this time of year.  They never came.  Instead, those freezers just kept filling over and over again with turkeys, and at the lowest prices for the biggest birds I've ever seen.  So there's another tradition busted.  Dammit.

6)  Sort of a recent tradition that we enjoy is taking the Neighborhood Tour.  We head out just a few days before Christmas to oooh and aaah at all the twinkles and sparkles that light up the oaks and maple trees, the snowmen, stars, nativities, Santas, and such on display in front yards, and on various roofs.  I think my favorite thing to see is a Christmas tree lit up in the front window of a home, for the world to see.  Last year we began counting how many "trees in a window" we could spot.  Maybe this year we'll make a scavenger hunt out of it.

7)  Mrs Smith will not be invited for dessert this year.  One tradition I am happy to bust.  I have finally learned to make my very own pumpkin pie.  And I'm not talking about popping open a can of Libby's mashed pumpkin.  I'm telling you that I bought three huge pumpkins this past Halloween.  I cut them into chunks, I boiled them, I mashed them, and I stocked my freezer full of the pumpkin guck.  I have already baked four pumpkin pies, and three pumpkin breads since then, and I still have enough for two more pies, and three more breads.  C'mon Christmas.

8)  Homemade ornaments on display.  That is one tradition I simply cannot give up.  Whether it's the ones my twenty four year old made in Sunday School or Kindergarten, the ones my nineteen year old son made in Cub Scouts, or the ones my younger daughters have made almost every year in elementary school ... I have to have them out.  One year I felt so guilty about not including my children's ornaments on my blue and silver themed tree, that I bought a small three foot tree designated only for homemade treasures.

9)  Christmas Eve has always been a very special time for my family.  We've always had our big Christmas dinner that evening, and as we sit around the fire, we open the gifts that have been sent from our out of state relatives.  I also use this time to remind my children about the spiritual meaning behind it all.  As exciting as it is, to get that early taste of Christmas, it's also satisfying enough to help the kids get to sleep at a decent time.

10)  Christmas Day traditions?  I don't think it's a tradition as much as it's just something we always do.  There will be coffee, and Christmas music.  I'll put on the seasonal cable channel that shows us a crackling fire while playing carols in the background.  We'll pass around gifts, and watch delightfully as each person receives something they either desperately wanted, or desperately needed.  There will be horrible photographs of everyone with bedhead (and me without makeup).  Afterward, we'll snack on coffee cake and fresh baked pumpkin bread.  The rest of the day will be spent enjoying our gifts, and each other's company.  We'll make phone calls to Connecticut, Maryland, Florida, and Texas.  We'll pull out the Christmas Eve leftovers, and top it off with coffee (or cocoa) and pie.  At the end of the day, we'll all be exhausted, but who wants a day like that to end?   

Our Trip To Gettysburg

(A continuation of Last Blast)...

The Saturday morning sun watched us drive through some quaint country towns in upper Maryland and lower Pennsylvania.  The kind where everyone knows everyone, and on this community yard sale day, everyone owns something that once belonged to everyone else.  We counted the deer that stood by the side of the road, poised to jump into the traffic... (four).  I began to wonder if any other vegetable actually existed, because all anyone ever grows is corn!

We stopped in at some of the local tourist shops, and walked away with the typical souvenirs; a t-shirt, a shot glass, some toys soldiers, and a key chain.  We armed ourselves with refreshments and a map of the area, and headed out for an adventure.

I was fully prepared to do some ghost hunting, with my digital camera, and voice recorder.  However, I ended up just so awed by the beauty of the landscape, imagining the plight of the soldiers, on both sides, and listening as Daddy recounted the events of those three horrendous days of battle.  Besides, there were such crowds everywhere we went, that I didn't want to start talking to ghosts, and have people think I was some sort of a loon.  The girls and I did find a moment of solitude in the garden of unknown soldiers, where we conducted a brief EVP session, and said a prayer for the men "known only to God".

Punkin's Ironic T-Shirt

Between the six of us, we climbed every last boulder that jutted out of the earth, trying to imagine the Union soldiers hiding among the rocks at Little Round Top,  firing at the Rebels across the valley, who hid among the rocks at Devil's Den.  And vice-versa. Those rocks hold the memories of the history they've seen, and I needed to soak it all up before I prayed for them to forgive the horrors of man.

Princess Hiding From The Sun

When Daddy finally made it to the top of a very steep hill on Seminary Ridge, he huffed and puffed and announced "Whew, I made it!"... I replied "Okay, now go fight a battle.".  It puts things into perspective, doesn't it?  Another thing that helped us gain a little perspective was the sighting of a few throwbacks to the day, who kindly paused in mid-conversation with another visitor, to pose for my camera.  From our viewpoint on the hilltop, we could see a tour group, using modern Segways to navagate the paths below.  One of the soldiers quipped "Here come the Confederate Segways... It's the only way they can take the hill".  LOL.  At that point we began referring to everything as Confederate... like the Confederate McDonald's where we later stopped for a Rebel milkshake.

All in all, it was a most wonderful day.  A good hike on a clear and sunny day, a few tears shed over some history remembered, and a lot of laughs during some family bonding.  I walked away with an appreciation, in that the three most important men in my life have not had to experience such an ordeal... and a compassion for those who have.

Our Last Blast of Summer '11

Within the span of seven days, the kids have gone back to school, we've had an earthquake, and a hurricane.  I have lots to tell you about all of that, but I'd much rather take a few moments to re-live our last blast of the summer.

Keeping with tradition, we took our annual long weekend excursion to Baltimore, to visit with my family. It's a cookie cutter vacation, meaning it's typically the same every year, but believe me, we have no complaints what so ever. Mom's place is as clean and organized as the best hotel, and even comes complete with mini shampoos and extra toothbrushes. If I didn't know her better, I'd be wondering where she hides the staff. Here are ten the highlights:

1) We left straight from Hubsy's workplace, and took the six hour drive by night.  That way, when Hubsy opened his eyes on the very first day of his vacation, he would actually be on vacation.  It was well worth it.

2) This time, we added an extra little day trip to the itinerary:  a tour of the infamous Gettysburg Civil War battlefield, led by my father, the amateur historian, and Confederate at heart.  (This experience will be the focus of my next posting).

3) Mom's pool is a great place to catch up on some parent/child bonding, but I repeated the word "Polo" so often, that I got a little goofy with it.  "Marco" was henceforth followed by Aspen, Obsession, Brut, or English Leather.  The whole thing ended up being nothing more than a Freudian game of word association.  Peanut butter led to jelly, which led to grape... nuts... vasectomy.

4) A hostile takeover of the local Olive Garden, by twelve members of the paternal clan.  Daddy and Second Mom, Little Bro and his two little impkins, Little Sis and her new hubs, plus my fam of five.  A bottle of wine made it's rounds, and I had my annual vacation margarita.  Daddy teased the waitress as often as possible.  My favorite quip went something like "I don't like this wine, and I'm going to send it back, right after you pour it and I drink it, and you pour it again."  

5) After dinner, the troupe headed over to Little Bro's place, where we enjoyed the hilarity of the toddler's musings.  For instance, being invited into her princess castle, to be hit with  the soft spoken announcement of "I got poops".  We giggled for hours about how the usual offering that accompanies an invitation, would be coffee or wine.

6) One of the best parts are the night swims, when the air is chilled and the water is warm. Turning on the pool lights, and turning up the music makes it feel like a real party!

7) Catching up on the family gossip.  I never get involved in the dramas, but I do like to hear about them.  It's nice to be reminded of where I come from, and why I choose to live two states away!

8) Bailing a hundred gallons of water out of the pool, with every bucket and can we could find, to lower the level enough for Mom to re-glue some loose tiles on a near dry surface.  For two days, we obsessed about those tiles.  It was such an event, that as we left Baltimore, I called from the car to tease her about some possible loose tiles in the Harbor Tunnel!

9) The annual crab feast!  It's the only time I ever get to express the Chesapeake gal in me.  The kids love to eat 'em, but I always have to guide them through the process.  Hubsy thinks it's just disgusting, but enjoys watching me chew on shells, slurp on that spicy seasoned juice, and dig out the yummy innards of an ocean floor scavenger.

10) Playing with Bob the Owl.  He's the yard guard, keeping birds from gathering around the pool, and rodents from nesting in the shed.  I decided that Bob needed a vacation too, and so I invited him to join us in whatever we were doing at the time.

The time is short, but it's just enough to recharge and refresh our outlook, and after being surrounded with Mom's near perfect decor, I actually return home a little excited about cleaning my house.

Bob's Got The Right Idea!

Our Family Easter Egg Tradition

Let The Games Begin

Things have sure changed since my mother sat me up at the table to color the eggs for Easter.  They've changed since I sat my first young'ens up to do the same.  I swear, every year they add more choices to the assortment of dye kits.  Should we cover them in glitter?  Tie die them?  Marbleize them?  Cover them in Disney stickers?  Sports stickers?  Should we dip them into the liquid color, or use these stamping pens?  Maybe we could just cover them in these shrink wraps?  I doubt that my grandmother had such a selection.  I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for those poor folk in the ancient age, when all they had was onion skins to color their eggs.

We decided on the marbleized color kit.  It included twelve color tablets, three of which were neon.  There's a drying tray, eight egg stands, twelve "fun disks" (whatever that means), and the original copper dipping tool that hasn't changed in design since I was three.  I had pre-boiled a dozen and a half eggs, and only one had cracked.  That's a new record!  And so the "fun" began after the dinner dishes had been cleared away.

The Finished Products

I open the box, only to find the copper dipping tool, and three tiny packages of color tablets.  Hubsy and I searched the empty box, and scratched our heads.  Where was all that other stuff?  Then we doubled over in laughter when we realized that the oversized packaging for those four little items WAS the other stuff!  Punching out the twelve little circles on the back, turns the box into the egg drying tray.  Now, what to do with those little circles?  Well, they turned out to be the fun disks!  The company suggests that we string them together to form a bracelet or necklace.  Oh yay!  Because I've always wanted a cardboard necklace that displays bits of instructions on how to color eggs!  But oh no, once you cut out the eight egg stands located on the sides of the box, you ruin the drying tray.

My Favorite Pieces

Oh well.  All we really wanted to do was carry on the family tradition, and in that we succeeded.  Just like every year that came before, the kids fought over who gets to use the dipping tool, and who gets stuck with the soup spoons.  We took bets on which color would be the first to be spilled.  It was the denim blue this year, by the way.  They bickered about wanting to use the same color at the same time, and they debated about whether or not one should "stir" the egg, or leave it alone to "soak".  Aaah, but I've learned a few things over the years.  My new tradition is to grab the last egg, myself, and blindly toss it into the nearest color bath, thus avoiding the annual wrestling match over the last egg!