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| Strangerously Cheesy |
Now, remember, I warned you. I posted it right at the top of this blog. This household is a circus, complete with clowns of questionable common sense, death defying feats of skill and courage, cute & fluffy animals, and even sticky floors! (It's a good thing I got that mop).
Ladies and Gentleman, please focus your attention on the shiny porcelain throne in the center ring...
It has not been used in three days. How do I know? It had just been scoured two days before, and the water was still cloudy with residue from the cleanser. I had also forgotten to turn the water valve back since cleaning, and no one else had taken it upon themselves to do so.
Now, this bathroom accommodates a high schooler, a middle schooler, and a grade schooler. I find it oddly hilarious that all three of these kids have been hoofing it up and down the stairs for three days, to use the only other bathroom available to them. They've even refrained from whining and complaining about it! This leads me to think that they thought their toilet had been broken, and didn't want to tell. Maybe they thought they did it!
It has not been used in three days. How do I know? It had just been scoured two days before, and the water was still cloudy with residue from the cleanser. I had also forgotten to turn the water valve back since cleaning, and no one else had taken it upon themselves to do so.
Now, this bathroom accommodates a high schooler, a middle schooler, and a grade schooler. I find it oddly hilarious that all three of these kids have been hoofing it up and down the stairs for three days, to use the only other bathroom available to them. They've even refrained from whining and complaining about it! This leads me to think that they thought their toilet had been broken, and didn't want to tell. Maybe they thought they did it!
So, I turned on the water valve, and flushed. Surprisingly, a light brown water with specs of gold began to fill the bowl. I thought it was a clog, but it seemed to be filling from the tank.
I Flushed again and the water began to clear, but now it's full of bits of brown, and colorful, floating debris. It is obvious now that this was not a clog. It's coming from the tank!
I Flushed again and the water began to clear, but now it's full of bits of brown, and colorful, floating debris. It is obvious now that this was not a clog. It's coming from the tank!
This required some investigation.
I remove the tank lid, and dive right in, figuratively speaking, of course.
I remove the tank lid, and dive right in, figuratively speaking, of course.
Let's see...
- Flush valve,
- Fill valve,
- Ballcock (don't laugh, that is what it's called),
- Plastic coke bottle filled with pebbles (again, don't laugh, I'm saving pennies on my water bill with every flush by displacing the water).
- Flapper and chain.
- Empty semi-degraded cardboard Cheetos can.
Wait... what?
Yes, that's right. I said empty semi-degraded cardboard Cheetos can. Dumbfounded, confounded, and mystified. I stood back and spoke to the air around me, repeating things that I learned in my high school Journalism class:
"Why?...
Uh, When?...
But Who?...
How did they?...
But Why again?
Neither myself, nor the air around me, could conjure an answer to those questions.
I first thought my daughter had tried to sneak the snack, and needed a quick stash for the evidence. But she didn't have to sneak, because I had given her my expressed permission to have them.
I then thought, perhaps she was emulating my actions with the Coke bottle.
"Hey Mom! We could go completely green, and recycle biodegradable products right here at home!"
I then thought, perhaps she was emulating my actions with the Coke bottle.
"Hey Mom! We could go completely green, and recycle biodegradable products right here at home!"
Notice that both of my first thoughts involved my daughter, the middle school Punkin. A confession never came. Only denial and distraction, no matter how much I interrogated.
Of course it was her.
Of course it was her.
The only explanation to this event is that we truly live in a circus. Why does the motorcycle go ninety miles per hour inside of a giant metal cage? Because he can. Why do fifty clowns pile in and out of a mini car? Because they can. Why would my daughter put a cardboard Cheetos can inside the toilet tank? I don't know.
