A few days ago, we made a quick stop at the grocery store for household supplies. Now, I know better than to waste my money buying health and beauty products at the grocery store, due to the huge markup, but on this occasion I gave in. I only needed one thing from that aisle anyway. That is until Hubsy announced his current need for shower gel. I was a little surprised to hear that, but hey, how would I know, I don't use his manly scented stuff. I'm a bar soap kind of gal. So I left him there to choose his gel, and a few minutes later we met up in the pasta aisle.
Later, while putting away our recent purchases, I am shocked to find that there are still three bottles of Hubsy's shower gel lined up in the tub. Now, there are four. "Well, maybe they are empty bottles", I tell myself. All of my clowns have a strange habit of leaving their empties laying around: shampoo, conditioner, hair remover, perfume, and lotions. Even pop tarts and Gatorade. Upon further investigation, I discover that each of these bottles was half full, depending on your outlook. Obviously Hubsy sees them as half empty.
It's the same with his collection of cologne. Six bottles in a basket on the shelf over the throne. There's one in the cabinet. And there's the one that he keeps in the car. Every time we go to the discount store, he is drawn to the display of all of our favorite cheap, imitation, knockoff designer scents. That's where he'll be when he's not raiding the snack aisle.
The paradox is this: He's a blue collar working man. There are always going to be more hours in the day in which he stinks, than the brief ones in which he doesn't.