The Most Interesting Teenager In The World

The Most Interesting Teenager in the World

The Most Interesting Teenager In The World, is a "meme game" that Hubsy and I created between ourselves, about the various misadventures of our teenage Punkin. It goes like this:

  • "I don't always ... (do the thing that she always does, that she's not supposed to do)"
  • "But when I do ... (I do it like this)"

These moments are never so funny while they're happening, but after the fact, the meme comes into play. This is the situation that inspired the ongoing game:

The sun shone down upon us, on the day that Punkin landed her first job. She had already been a "temporary marketing assistant" in Hubsy's office.  Basically, a street corner sign spinner who stuffed envelopes on rainy days. Both Punkin and The Boy worked about four days a week, and were bringing some much needed funds into the household.  But on that day, she officially held two jobs.

She had begun dating a local boy and he hooked her up with a sweet gig at his place; Domino's Pizza. She was to begin training right away, but she still had some time left on her temporary contract, so she took on both responsibilities. We were so proud.

Her boyfriend would provide much of her transportation since they often worked the same schedule. She sometimes procured rides from other friends or coworkers. We offered our services, but were declined, and that was fine because it saved us time and gas. We also didn't want to interrupt her in her drive to handle her own responsibilities. We were so proud.

(Ppssst... there was never a job at Domino's.)

She borrowed a shirt from Hubsy, until her uniform order came in, but she washed it and wore it on her shifts, at least three days a week. Her schedule varied, but remained on the 1 a.m. closing shift.  Some nights, after counting receipts, kitchen cleanup, and food prep for the day shift, she wouldn't get home until 2 or 3. Sometimes she would accompany a driver on a delivery run and come home with tips!  

(Hey, there was never a job at Domino's.)

For three months, she entertained us with stories of The Domino's Adventure.

  • She reenacted conversations that she had with rude telephone customers.
  • We laughed with her about the soap bubble catastrophe, when their dishwasher overflowed. She showed us pics on her phone! 
  • She often came home with flour on her shirt, and in her hair, or on her face. A visiting friend once commented on how she smelled of pizza! 
  • She confided to us that their front door was broken, and couldn't be fully secured. It took a week for them to get it fixed. 
  • We did drive her to work one night, when her ride was more than fashionably late. I watched her walk through the front door, and then through the employee door! 
  • She sweetly offered to prepare dinner for the family one night. She couldn't wait to share with us, how to make a Domino's chicken strip wrap with homemade honey mustard dressing. 
(Have I mentioned that she never worked at Domino's?)

Okay, so there was one issue with this job. Three months of work and not a paycheck to show. But she (and other employees) had filed the appropriate complaints with the franchise owner, and the corporate office. The response was that a particular manager, who had been creative with his reporting of employee hours, was fired.

(Remember what I said, now, there was never any job for her at Domino's)

We wanted her to quit the job after the first month of not being paid, but she had been working so hard and logging so many hours. When the paperwork was settled, she would be paid for all of this time. It was also certainly better than having her just sleeping and watching TV all day.

As more time passed, Hubsy decided to handle this matter once and for all, and prepared to call the corporate office. Punkin even Googled the number and handed him the phone! She stood right beside him, as he was told that they have no record of her, but that they would check with the franchise owner.

The franchise owner also had no idea who in the hell she was. Out of disbelief, Hubsy and I went to the store and showed the night manager her photo. She also had never seen her face before.

(Did I mention that there was no job at Domino's?)

There was no freakin' job at Domino's!
Then came the story about assisting a friend who works in towing and roadside assistance.

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