Ladies and Gentlemen,
The Ringmaster's Family Circus is proud to present
a stunt that has never before been attempted under this big top!
Keep your eyes on the center ring
to see the amazing metamorphosis of
The Ringmaster Mama,
from family manager to home school administrator.
as The Ringmaster attempts to
wrestle and wrangle,
constrain and control
the wild and willful
Armed with nothing more than
my own wits
and every available technology,
I will take her from
Disobedient, Disrespectful, Disinterested,
(and "dis" close to becoming a ward of the Dept of Juvenile Justice)
Motivated, Educated, and Inspired.
Make sure you've got your popcorn,
and prepare to be dazzled!